Category Archives: Marriage

His Heart is My Heart: A Love Story

Though I’ve been sealed to him for over 38 years, I came to understand, in a heartbeat, that his heart is my heart – literally – the moment the doctor informed us that Bob was in cardiac arrest and would need to be transferred immediately to another hospital. He was in pain. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. It felt like we were in the Twilight Zone. This can’t be happening. He’s too young (61) and in excellent physical condition. He’s that guy who’s never taken a break from physical activity since his high school basketball days. Among his greatest joys in life is still being able to take on some of the local high school basketball team players at the gym and occasionally beating them at 21. Which is exactly what he had just done, when he arrived home a little after 11 pm that fateful night.

I followed the ambulance the entire way to Temecula Valley Hospital where the cardiac team was waiting to take him immediately into the Cath Lab. The moment I understood the gravity of what was happening, prior to him being transferred, I left the ER so that I could get cell phone reception. In shock, I called my oldest daughter Jennette who lives nearby to tell her what was happening, but mostly to asked her to send her husband to administer a priesthood blessing. I barely made it through that conversation. My faith was in the knowledge of God’s Plan and I knew that Bob’s life was in His Hands – above all others. Continue reading

Finding the Best Fit: Four Marriage Paradoxes

To Try On or Not to Try On? That is the Question.

store windowsI don’t like to buy clothes online. I have, but it always seems to be a 50/50 proposition. I’m a tall, Scandinavian gal and concerned that things won’t fit right, and I’m correct at least half the time. For me, heading to the store where I can try them on works best. I want to make sure it’s long enough.  I don’t want it to pull and tug and bunch up. I want to twist and turn in the clothes, in front of that three-way mirror to be sure nothing that shouldn’t show doesn’t. Many of my friends enjoy shopping for the season’s latest styles online in their sweats with a cup of hot cocoa. Whatever they order comes right to their door and fits great for them. I wish things were different for me that way. But then again, if they were, maybe I’d miss out on that big chunky necklace hanging by the check-out counter that looks perfect with my new blouse.

How about shopping for a spouse? Do you think someone might have better success, find a ‘better fit,’ by trying a person on first? Can people find a great fit or a good match, by not engaging in ‘up close and personal’ behaviors before the wedding? What do you think the prevailing thoughts in society are on this? Continue reading

My Husband Is My Boyfriend! A Marriage Formula.

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I am crazy in love with my wonderful husband, Chad.  It is more common than not for me to introduce him to others as ‘my boyfriend’. I make no apologies for it, or for advocating that every marriage can, and should, be as wonderful as ours is. The health and vitality of our relationship is not due to who we each are individually, because we are each flawed people (trust me on this). Instead, it has everything to do with the conscious choices we have both made to:

  • Use the counsel of the Lord on marriage, given through His prophets, as our guide.
  • Watch and follow the example of those couples we have observed around us who obviously find joy and satisfaction in their marriages.
  • And to make ‘us’ our highest priority.
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Camilla & Spencer W. Kimball

marriagePresident Spencer W. Kimball was the prophet of my youth and during the emergence of my personal testimony. I love him, and trust his counsel still. He and his sweet wife, Camilla, have (yes, I say that in present tense) a beautiful marriage. I enjoyed watching them together. So when he spoke on marriage, I listened. In an address titled “Oneness In Marriage”, this beloved prophet made this hope-filled promise: Continue reading

20 Years Standing “The Family: A Proclamation to the World”

 

With the way things are going in society these days, do you ever wonder what, as members of the Lord’s Church, we would do without “The Family: A Proclamation to the World“?

If so, then I know exactly how you feel. Continue reading

Why LDS Temple Marriages Can’t Be Redefined by the World

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I will never forget the words spoken during the temple marriage of my youngest sister. The sealer looked around the beautiful room full of friends and family and said the following:

“When we come inside holy temples of God, we feel protected by their sacred, strong and solid walls.  We might feel like we never want to leave such a beautiful place because it is so safe and protected from the world. However, please remember and take comfort in knowing that the covenants we make with God, and the symbols that we take with us and wear, are stronger than the walls of this temple.”

I walked out of the temple that day a different person. Those words have forever changed the way I view my temple marriage and the covenants that I have made with my husband and with God.

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Journey to Legalize Same-Sex Marriage Has Prepared Mormons for Future

temple marriageImmediately following Friday’s decision by the Supreme Court of the United States that legalizes same-sex marriage in all 50 states, without fanfare The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon) stood as a beacon of light in how faithful members of the Lord’s Church should stand stating that LDS doctrine about marriage will not change.

Mormon Newsroom: Supreme Court Decision Will Not Alter Doctrine on Marriage:

“The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints acknowledges that following today’s ruling by the Supreme Court, same-sex marriages are now legal in the United States. The Court’s decision does not alter the Lord’s doctrine that marriage is a union between a man and a woman ordained by God. While showing respect for those who think differently, the Church will continue to teach and promote marriage between a man and a woman as a central part of our doctrine and practice.”

Although the complete legalization of gay marriage in the United States has seemed like a long journey, members of the LDS Church are well prepared for the days ahead. We’ve made covenants. We know the doctrine. We know the Lord’s position on the matter because Prophets and Apostles, who we believe are inspired by God, have counseled and taught us both the doctrine and to love those with differing views. Many have sincerely prayed for personal understanding and help to know how to navigate this issue on many different levels—both within and outside of the Church and in our families. We’ve got this! Continue reading

Pressing Forward with Family: Keeping Our Faith and Declaring Our Witness until the End

family-portrait-mongolia-1154366-galleryI am disheartened by the Supreme Court’s decision today legalizing same-sex marriage in all 50 states, but I don’t feel defeated. I feel empowered and stronger than ever about my faith.

When we know that what is right is being buffeted, scorned, ridiculed, and torn apart to shreds, we cannot as the hymn says, “shrink and shun the fight.” There just simply is no time for that. In fact, in that same hymn, “True to the Faith” (Hymn #254), it declares, “True to the faith that our parents have cherished. True to the truth for which martyrs have perished. To God’s command, Soul, heart, and hand, Faithful and true we will ever stand.” We all have to press forward in faith, and declare our witness of the gospel of Jesus Christ until the very end.

The fact is the Lord has been preparing us for these assaults on morality for many years. He has been communicating His mind and will through His latter-day prophets, seers, and revelators regarding these tough societal issues of which we will have to face and make decision. In Rome, back in the fall of last year, a delegation consisting of two of the apostles, President Henry B. Eyring, Elder L. Tom Perry, and the Presiding Bishop of the Church, Elder Gerald Causse’, was invited to the Vatican by Pope Francis. Elder Eyring spoke before an international, interreligious colloquium testifying about the values of traditional marriage, and “the complementarity between man and woman.” Continue reading

Redefining Marriage and Polygamy

file000619663500Marriage is being redefined in a few countries across the world. In fact on Tuesday, April 28, 2015, the Supreme Court of the United States of America will hear arguments on whether or not the states of that nation have the constitutional right to define marriage solely as a union between one man and one woman. Many members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints find themselves asking or answering some tough questions about redefining marriage and polygamy.

I have heard many people complain that the Church has no right to defend the definition of marriage as a union between one man and one woman simply because in the early days of the Church some prophets, apostles, and common Church members practiced polygamy. They suffered great persecutions because of it. Shouldn’t  the LDS Church be more sympathetic to other types of unions? Continue reading

Boyd K. Packer: Laws Governing Powers of Procreation

Boyd-K-Packer-2015Aged and breathless, President Boyd K Packer sat and spoke with the heart, knowledge, and experience from a life well lived. Spoken with power from the Holy Ghost, he taught us about the “Plan of Happiness”. This plan, he explained, includes romance leading to marriage, physical intimacy leading to children, and repentance leading to a soul unspotted before God.

President Packer taught about how the laws governing the powers of procreation were established before the earth began. He said:

There are eternal laws, including laws relating to this power to give life, “irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated” (D&C 130:20). These are spiritual laws which define the moral standard for mankind (see Joseph Smith Translation, Romans 7:14–15 [in the Bible appendix]; 2 Nephi 2:5;D&C 29:34; 134:6). There are covenants which bind, seal, and safeguard and give promise of eternal blessings” (Boyd K. Packer, The Plan of Happiness, Apr. 2015 General Conference).

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Huffington Post Reports on Mormon Sexuality

Mormon sexualityRecently, The Huffington Post did a series of interviews on various religions, asking select members of each faith how their church views sexuality. This controversial subject is one that is often misrepresented amongst members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons). Where those interviewed did a fair job in answering the questions, it’s clear that the world really doesn’t understand what Mormons believe when it comes to sexually related topics. For instance, within the LDS faith masturbation and pornography are never okay — before or after marriage or within the marriage relationship.

Mormons are very much like other religious people. We follow what the scriptures say. We believe that keeping one’s self pure and free of sexual sin brings one closer to God and brings happiness into one’s life. We believe that good is still good, and evil is still evil. Our prophets have reminded us to be sensitive and respectful, to those who struggle with sexual or gender identity, but by the same token, we desire to be respected for our own beliefs. Continue reading